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Automakers Really Need To Work On Hiding Their Drivers

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WARNING: What you are about to read will forever change the way that you look at pictures of new cars.

There’s no arguing that pictures of new cars are pretty badass, but there’s one aspect that I just can’t seem to get past. Whenever a new car is pictured in motion, it requires a driver behind the wheel, which I completely understand, but most of the time the driver’s face is just an absolute eyesore that destroys any and all chances of enjoying the picture.

Wow. Look at those new headli—goddamnit. There he is.

There are a few automakers that attempt to hide the driver’s face in the shadows, but you can almost always spot it if you look hard enough. It’s one of those things where once you see it, it’s impossible to look away—like when you’re talking to someone who is oblivious to the fact that there is a piece of lettuce blanketing their teeth.

After scouring the internet for examples of this (which weren’t hard to find), I started to draw some conclusions about these people. I found that the majority of drivers tend to take a page out of Adam Sandler’s book, believing that a pair “magic sunglasses” will keep us from seeing them. Not true.

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There are a small percentage of drivers brave enough to expose their entire face and provide us with a window to their soul. Most of the uncovered faces are men who seem to exude a strong sense of confidence. They have this smug look on their face that tells me they probably try and pick up women by flashing these photos around at bars.

Yeah, that’s me lurking in the shadows of a car that’s not even for sale yet. Not a big deal or anything.

The whole driver’s face thing probably isn’t an issue for most people, but it’s something that has bothered me for a while now. I have to ask, does anyone else have a similar problem with this? If not, there’s a good chance that you will the next time you come across a picture of a new car.

Good luck.

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John is a full-time automotive blogger who digs cars, but also spends a disturbing amount of time watching and reading about movies. His first car was a maroon 1993 Buick Skylark which, after a solid seven-year run, was laid to rest in August of 2013. He currently writes for phantomcopy.com.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Aaron Schinke

    Jan 30, 2014 at 2:35 pm

    You’ve just been mind ninja’d. boom.

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Ford Continues to Please Minivan-Skeptic Soccer Moms

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Ford Aerostar Minivan Exterior Does Ford Still Make

If the words Aerostar, Windstar and Freestar mean anything to you, you know that Ford is responsible for some of the best minivans ever made. Beginning with the first model Aerostar in 1986, Ford’s snub-nosed minivan set the standard of what would be created by automotive manufacturers in this class for decades.

The Aerostar was also the first minivan in the United States to feature upgraded, luxury packages. With an XLT package, and Eddie Bauer trim levels, the Ford Aerostar allowed drivers to bring passengers, cargo and more in style. For the first time, drivers could take advantage of the versatile and reliable minivan platform, without sacrificing comfort and convenience.

Does Ford Still Make a Minivan?

The Aerostar continued in the mid-90s as the Ford Windstar. The Windstar was a complete reinvention, shifting the drivetrain from RWD to FWD, and bringing the flagship minivan more in line with current minivan design. The Windstar became the Freestar in the early 2000s, lasting until the 2007 model year, with the final Ford “Star line” minivan rolling off the assembly line in December of 2006.

While we don’t know for sure what was behind Ford’s decision to discontinue their family-marketed minivan, we can take a guess. For starters, Ford has extended their reputation for reliable cars and trucks into the crossover market. With options covering a wide range of size and seating configurations (everything from the subcompact Ford Ecosport to the boxy family hauler Ford Flex), crossovers have become the new favorite for family vehicles.

Ford’s versatile crossover line has a vehicle that can meet almost any need. Do you have a small family? Go with the popular 2018 Ford Escape. Big family with lots of stuff to haul? The 2018 Ford Expedition has your back.

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Although crossovers and SUVs provide some distinct advantages (presence of AWD, higher ground clearance, and uni-body construction), the market for minivans hasn’t completely died, and neither has Ford’s commitment to providing drivers with a competent and compelling option.

Good News: Ford Still Makes a Passenger Minivan

ford transit connect passenger van in solar color_oAlthough Ford’s marketing has shifted toward promoting their incredible range of crossovers and SUVs as family choices, they still offer a more traditional minivan in the Ford Transit Connect Passenger Wagon. Utilizing the same body construction as the Ford Transit cargo van, the Transit Connect Passenger Wagon features up to 7 seats, and plenty of standard safety and comfort technology.

Lower ride height (easier in and out), sliding doors and greater visibility are among the reasons people still prefer vans for transporting their families. Additionally, the more contoured shape of most crossovers (not looking at you, Ford Flex) means that vans provide better cargo room! Family of four traveling cross-state with three suitcases? A Ford Explorer should be a great option.

Family of six, with a dog and 10 bags going cross-country, however, and the Ford Transit Connect Passenger Wagon starts to look a lot more up to the job.

Ford has a sterling reputation across the spectrum of vehicles they manufacture. Although the Transit Connect Passenger Wagon isn’t among their more well-known, it’s among the most competent and best value options in the minivan class.

 

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I Wasn’t Always a Dale Jr Fan – But Now I Get It

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It was the crowning moment of the career of Nascar’s most popular driver. The 2004 Daytona 500. The chosen son, Dale Earnhardt Jr, had won the race that his father tragically died competing in only three years earlier.

Reports of the day say that everyone in the crowd was on their feet, cheering. Grown men were in tears. It was quite the moment, they say.

Well, I can tell you that there was at least one person that wasn’t cheering. That’s because I was that lone defector. (more…)

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The Essence Of 90’s Chevy Truck Commercials

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If you ever watched television for more than an hour at any time during the 90’s, you probably remember Chevy’s “Like a Rock” commercials. They aired on just about every channel, so they were pretty hard to miss—and pretty hard to forget as well. Even two decades later the sound of Bob Seger belting out those now-famous words is still shockingly memorable. (more…)

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